Open Letter to Tom Cruise

If you choose to not get political, feel free to skip over this post...  But, it has been weighing heavily on my heart and I felt the need to do so. I wanted to post this on Veterans Day, but chose not to ...
I can not hold back any longer, I need to say it now:

An open letter to Tom Cruise in regards to statements made relating him to military:

(Taken from TMZ)

First, the Middle East -- Tom says his location shoots are just like serving a tour in Afghanistan, "That's what it feels like. And certainly on this last movie, it was brutal. It was brutal."

As for his physical training, Tom said, "There is difficult physical stamina and preparation. Sometimes I've spent months, a year, and sometimes two years preparing for a single film." But the kicker, he adds, "A sprinter for the Olympics, they only have to run two races a day. When I'm shooting, I could potentially have to run 30, 40 races a day, day after day."

Cruise's lawyer, Bert Fields, says the notion that Tom compares his acting to fighting a war is a distortion, pointing to a section in the deposition -- not part of the deposition that was publicly released -- in which Tom is asked, "Do you believe the situations [being in a movie and fighting a war in Afghanistan] are the same?"  Tom replies, "Oh come on."  Fields says that clearly means "of course not."

For the record, here's Tom's quote, responding to the opposing lawyer in the deposition:

Lawyer:  "Now, your counsel has publicly equated your absence from Suri for these extended periods of time as being analogous to someone fighting in Afghanistan.  Are you aware of that?"

Cruise:  "I didn't hear the Afghanistan, but that's what it feels like, and certainly on this last movie, it was brutal.  It was brutal."

Tom Cruise,

As a military wife, it really bothers me that you think your job has any comparison what so ever to the military.  No, I have never gone and served in combat, but as the wife left back home, I just do not seem to see the similarities...

You make MILLIONS of dollars for a film.
Most military members do not even make $50,000 for a YEAR in COMBAT.

You fly private jets and take limos to events, alone or with friends/family of your choosing.  
They WALK in combat, DROP from helicopters, fly commercial to return home to see family, fly with coffins carrying their brothers and sisters in arm. 

You dine at fancy restaurants, order room service, have basically anything you want to eat/drink as soon as your desire comes out of your mouth... 

They eat MEALS from BOXES.  Sometimes the only hot meal of the day is a breakfast that you would not even think about eating...  The cookies/snacks that you take for granted are the finest treats or memories of home and loved ones.

You can pick up the phone and call (or even jet over to see) your loved ones whenever you want.
They spend days/weeks/months before they even get to meet their newborn baby for the first time.  Missing birthdays, holidays, special "first times".  Even missing the simple things of reading bedtime stories, helping with brushing teeth, holding hands with their loved ones, hugs just because.

This is not even getting into what they see and do during combat that you nor I will (luckily) never have to know about.  
If they are lucky enough to return home, they come home changed:

Fourth of July or other celebrations take on a new fear... They can not be in crowds, hear fireworks... for some riding down the street is difficult as they are terrified of the fear of an IED waiting somewhere..
Forget a welcome home party as the crowd and surprise of things is just too much to deal with.

Family movie nights?  Best make popcorn before they get there or buy the bags already popped, even that is too much for some... 

Going out to dinner?  Hope that you have a seat where they will not have their back to anything except for a wall... 

You return home...  Sleepless nights... flashbacks... bad dreams...  not to mention if you lost anyone while you were deployed...   The military seems to be a bit more than what it is in your head...

You think your life is hard and that it is easy to compare your "training" to military...
Why not cancel a few movie premiers and go join up and try to go through bootcamp...  Try to certify for all the weapons you would need to know every single detail about... 
See if you can handle all that they go through... day to day..  over and over .... 

I know you might have not exactly meant it the way it came out... but it was taken that way.

As a wife that has gone through a deployment:  spending many nights alone... with a newborn baby ... hoping and praying that he would return home safe...   hoping that her baby would know his daddy... hating that he missed his sons first birthday... missed his first word... missed his first time crawling, rolling over, his first step....   hating that I could not wake up knowing he was not in harms way... 
hoping and praying for an email, phone call, skype, anything to know he was okay.

Do you know how many times we watched VIDEO of my husband reading books so that our son would know his daddy when he did return?    Picture books of daddy all over so he would know him?
Yes...   that is military life... and quite honestly, I find it very offensive that you (a celebrity) would think that you remotely compare at all to our finest... the men and women in uniform that allow you the freedom to say and do as you please.

(Big thanks to Mark Wahlberg for standing up for our military!)


  1. Tom Cruise is a good actor. That's all he is good at. He also doesn't believe that depression is a real thing. They guy needs a serious wake up call!

  2. I was furious as well. Not only did he say such crud he used it as an excuse to not be a father to his daughter. Its just sick!!

  3. Very well said, Noelle. I didn't see the original quote, so thanks for including it.

  4. We took a trip last Spring Break where he was and people were in the trees trying to catch a glimpse of him. It was crazy!

  5. Well written, Noey. Lots of thought, not just a rant. Love you.

  6. Love your letter..I can't even watch his movies anymore...ever since the couch incident


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